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Thursday, April 28, 2005

coffee shop moms

Here's what I love: being at a coffee shop where there is a cool urban mom giving her cool urban kinder little nibbles of whatever, let's say scones, while she sits wearing cool urban sneakers and reading the paper.

Here's what I hate: being at a coffee shop where there is a cool urban mom, distracting me from my very important real work with various and sundry images of cool urban motherhood.

Really, I have such mixed feelings about the coffee shop moms.* I am sure one day I shall be one, with some level of cool. But I guess that's what's scary, because I both totally identify with them and see them as absolutely foreign creatures. It's like how before I was married but just heading towards marriage, I would meet women my age who introduced me to their "husbands," and I would think secretly to myself, "oh, you have a husband, how brave of you not to be embarrassed about that." Because being married seemed so weird and, I don't know, not old exactly but definitely domesticated, and settled and sedated. And to be a wife, and a husband-haver...that was truly bizarre.

So anyway, I'm a grad student; sitting at coffee shops in the morning is a big part of what I do. It's also a big part of what moms do. But rather than making me feel closer to the idea of myself as a mom, sitting at a coffe shop with the CSM's just makes me feel so weirdly vexed.


*NB: I only have mixed feelings about the cool laid-back sneaker-wearing moms. The kind of CSM who does her make up, puts on stacked-heeled loafers, and ties baby in bows for the coffee shop--her, I straight up hate. I mean, who does she think she is? Is she confusing my coffee shop with a society luncheon? I mean really, lady, let's keep the fashion bar -low- here. Jesus.


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